Question to all the women out there..........

Question to all the women out there..........

So okay I've always wondered about this.............I always hear women complaining about that they want a guy who's nice and that doesn't play, that doesn't treat them like shit and you know all that stuff BUT THEN once the guy is there for them providing them with what they want THEN they dump him and then go to a guy that treats them like shit.............I know this might be old but damn it gets on my nerves so can you PLEASE PLEASE explain that me???? seriously how does that work lol damn cause my girl dumped me cause I'm "too nice" to be true lol.........really dissapointing and yes I'm a little pissed off about it but shit happens I guess...so yea just that question ladies, thanks for ur attention and responses.

I can't speak for all girls, but personally I can't stand guys who kiss my ass. It's cute at first but the whole thing gets old really quick. And it's not that we go after assholes, I just think that we like guys who don't let us walk all over them.

ive been wondering the same shit man, im a clean dude, i dont do drugs, i dont smoke, im told im fairly attractive, basically a good guy, but all these girls go out with these abusive, alcoholic cats, wats up with that? well neway shell prolly run bak 2 u if it wus meant 2 be

u see but that's the thing.... I never kissed her ass though. I just gave her her own space and what not u kno it's RESPECT...I wouldnt' call that kissin ass. I just treated her good and respected her that's all........but you have a VERY good point cause there's guys out there who make themselves all desperate and what not so u got a point there.....

yea bro I feel on that one. I've never been drunk, never tried pot or nethin of that sort and been told that I'm cute many times b4 and I don't even go for looks man well yes a little but not that much and well my point is this........is it so damn hard to find a woman with self-respect and that is honest???? cause man I've been tryin to find a girl like that for A LONG TIME dawg that to this point it's not even kool anymore...... like if I ask her out or somethin u kno I'd rather have her tell me u kno what u seem nice but I like datin other kinda guys or w/e u kno and I'd b fine wit dat and even though they kno I'm koo they STILL LIE...... I like when ppl bring it straight man I don't like when the play mind games.....mind games KILL ME lol

maybe its the whole "bad-boy" thing?

yea maybe.......but phuk that lol I'm not gonna change who I am to impress a girl man lol she either likes me for who I am or she doesn't u kno..... I feel sorry for girls that only like guys for interest cause of their cars or money or popularity u kno but oh well it's their choice I guess..........but one thing is for sure though... when will they learn that is not right u kno meh someday I guess oh well lol *shrugs*

Here's a good read that i had posted in my journal tha was written by a chick.

I'm in the same boat as you guys.

Why Good Girls Always Want the Bad Boys
By Laura Snyder

"I just want a nice guy," women whine. Then they date the first drunken leather-clad jerk who spills his drink on her dress. What gives?
Well, it's more than just because "nice" is generally considered shorthand for "boring sex." Here's why some babes love the allure of the bad boy.

It's Genetic

All of human history - and thus, our genetic programming -- rewards those brave enough to take risks. The cowardly caveman died in his lonely cavern, while the brave one ventured out and survived. Sure, the "dangerous" caveman might not be as pleasant to sit with by the fire at night, but he appealed to the cavewoman because he'd pass along stronger genes.

It's All In Our Heads

What's so sexy - and makes us feel so good - about being with the bad boy? For starters, he's got confidence, and that's sexy because it's a sign of strength. But there's more: dating the bad boy carries an element of risk. And risk triggers the production of the feel-good brain chemical dopamine. We may be intrigued by his notorious drug and alcohol problems (and he probably has 'em), but it's really our own "drugged" nervous system that does us in.

We Love a Challenge

Women love to play relationship therapist (just listen in on a conversation with our girlfriends if you need proof). In order to achieve this, we need to find a jerk to lie down on our couch. We love the idea of being the woman who solves this mysterious man's problems and turns him into our own Prince Charming.

We Know What to Expect

With bad boys, we know what to expect. We'll try to change them, it won't work, and we'll be left heartbroken. But, it will be entirely not our fault. Whereas if we date Mr. Nice Guy and doesn't work out, we're going to have to take some ownership of the failure. Some women are just more comfortable playing the victim.

found something else in my journal about this topic...written by some dude called the Nice Guy Theory. Sums up my love life at the moment.

==========================================================

NICE GUYS FINISH LAST


It’s amazing that assholes can get girls. Actually, now that I think of it, it’s not that amazing. They are assholes at heart, but to meet girls they lavish their undying love. IT’S A CHARADE. They act nice, friendly, and they listen… until they get into what they’re after. Their prey thinks they are in love with them, however when they realize what assholes their predators really are, they pretend like the asshole is really nice inside. The girl tries to change the asshole into a nice guy, but assholes will always be assholes.

She gets upset and goes to the nice guy to complain about the asshole. But she claims to love the asshole… now this is where the theory begins. She doesn’t want to look like she is easy so she wont dump the asshole right away, instead she will stay with the asshole. Girls are idiots. They don’t realize that the nice guy has been there all along. He never had to pretend to be a good guy to get girls because he is naturally like that. However, girls don’t see it for some reason or another. They look at the nice guy as a friend, a trusted companion to whom they can tell their sad story to about their asshole boyfriend. But the nice guy isn’t THAT naïve. He was trying to score with the girl he listens to all along. The problem is that since he is a nice guy he keeps listening. Since girls get attached to things that pay attention to them, they think of the nice guy as a friend. A FRIEND. They don’t say, “Oh he’s hot†or “I want to have his children†about the nice guy, they just want the emotional support. When they get the emotional support from the nice guy, they don’t need it from the asshole.

The nice guy gets the shit end of the stick while the asshole gets all the action. I am starting to wonder if being a nice guy is really the route to take to get action… I have been down this path for all of my post-pubescent life and it has gotten me NOWHERE… at least not in the women department. Perhaps another reason why girls fall for the asshole is because assholes ignore the girl they are with. The women wonder, “Why isn’t he paying attention to me?†so they explore why. They poke and prod and get closer to the asshole. They start to get easier with each attempt to get closer. The asshole finally says, “I’ve let this beauty dangle long enough, time to boat this bassâ€. It is then he puts on his charade and the girl feels like she has won him… even thought all she has won is an asshole.

Once you have gone down the path as a nice guy or a “listener†you can’t turn back. The girl will always go after the assholes because there are always nice guys there to listen. Once you realize that you are a “listener†you cant do anything about it… just pack up and close shop. There is and never will be a situation where the nice guy will get the girl he has a crush on. It just doesn’t work like that. The girl wont “come to her senses†and realize what an asshole her boyfriend is like in the movies… instead she will just go after another asshole, and unless you stop being a nice guy, she will never go after you.

Women complain that there are no nice guys in the world. Riiiight. They are obviously not looking hard enough because there are nice guys EVERYWHERE!!!! Girls aren’t looking for nice guys… they say they are but they’re not. They are looking for the perfect asshole, but there is NO SUCH THING as the perfect asshole. All in all, the nice guy gets the shaft. To all the girls out there with boyfriends that don’t treat you with respect, that don’t listen to you, and that don’t care about you I say this; look next to you. The guy that has been standing next to you the whole time is the guy you have been looking for. He is what you want your asshole to be like.

He knows more about you than you know about yourself… because he has listened to it all.

lol nice guys huh? nah theres no room for us out there theres only 2 kind of people the ones who get stepped on and the ones who do the stepping and since were nice guys of course we get stepped on. girls dig that bad boy shit i dont know y. but eh w/e . you have 99 problems but a bitch shouldnt be one. sorry gals

guys - just be more aggressive...have more of an edge. don't be all sappy ALL the time. it's great if you're nice...it helps a lot...but women don't want the guy that'll kiss her feet all the time. smothering = BAD.


don't stop paying attention to her, either...showing disinterest works, but only for a short time...once you have her, pay more attention to her.

I totally agree with u

U guys heard the saying "nice guys finish last"

u can look that up and there will be a lot of stories on that

yes thats true they way a girls gets mad and wants u is when u stop paying attention to her.

girls need attention and yes u need attention if we dont pay attention its over.

sure, if you ignore your girl for too long, she'll want out. no girl in her right mind will stay in a relationship where she feels like she's not wanted...if she does, then she's a fool.

u got that right. u were taught well

okay so basically we shouldnt be nice at all, girls want the "fonzie" type lol

that's where you folks go wrong...there's gotta be a happy medium. don't be a total asshole, but don't me a complete sap. extremes are BAD.

ok so we can all agree being nice is not the right way 2 go about it

and as far as ignoring goes, i think guys are kinda scared 2 do that b4 they actually get the girl since theres like 40 million other guys just waitin 4 the opportunity 2 strike

nice to a point but not nice like a walking all over u.

well I dk I guess I'm the middle most of the time when it comes to women but well like someone said in the shoutbox yesterday....... GIRLS ARE IMPOSSIBLE lol and of course they'll never make their mind up about anything....... but well of course there are some girls out there that know exactly what they want u kno.....wish I had a girl like that, just straight to the point.

the problem is identifying which is which, ne pointers?

we all come with surprises

some good some bad....

lol

i completely agree with moon angelz. its about the "act" qettin old real quick. like i think most girls like a challenge, just like most guys do.

lets say theres 2 girls that have caught ur interest. you let both of them know .. one jumps on that shyt real quick and is on your ass all the time.. the other one aint even thinkin about giving you the time of day... which one are you gonna go for? the one thats seems a little too desperate, or the one that you think you can't have.

we always want what we can't have.

its all about the C H A L L E N G E babieeee !

now guys that are like alcoholics and hit their girls n shit, thats a different story. those girls are like masochists n shyt.

theres my input

good - bye

- melissa
:rule:

^^ thats a good way to say it.

u know wat be cool is if we had a car option system on girl. ok i want ummmm hispanic 5'5 sitting on 20's i want extended warrantyand if any case i dont like it i can just return it and get a new one.

eh fuck it I'm endin this with I'M STAYIN SINGLE!!!!! HELLO SINGLE LIFE lol

which in turn means theres another girl out there for u cuz sumwhere out there that has happened to a girl. lol if u guys r cool ill introduce to my sister shes pretty cool shes pretty shes 16 but i quote vin diesel from FAST AND FURIOUS "break her heart and ill break you neck"